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April 03, 2005
discovering me, discovering you
It is so deliciously obvious to me, that we delve in love and loving, the kind that comes with understanding and discovery of
unknown territories. This site has been such a blessing to my life,
sitting here, registering my far away thoughts without realising any boundries, taking the layers off, on by one, prancing naked, showing you who I am, or my perception of who I thrive to be. Allowing you to come inside me, within the deep elements of my thoughts and being, where not many have been allowed before, and bringing even to my sight where I had not dared before in my life.
I know Marjan loves me more, since she reads me here, and there is a growing intimacy between us. the way she looks at me at the dinner table, serves me tea, and the privilage of our common bond, beyond the physicality of our cohabitaion, and nurturing this beautiful garden of our lives. And I have also seen it in Maryam , my sister, we have never been this close and aware of each other, even my brother Hossein, who does visit here sometimes. The way Fafar is even more loving, and caring, expressing her emotions, the way Shahrzad stands closer and talks to me much more than she used to.
I know Fereydoon although he has always been the keeper of the messages, and the host of my many rants before, but even him stands closer in his Emails and messages. And Cyrus my eternal man crush, as manly and carefull as he is in his expressions, he is also much closer to me, and I do owe him so much, for arranging this, for pushing me to go on, and write, to find a way to become so much closer to the people I love, and show them who I thrive to be.
There is a lesson in this, there is such a pity for us becoming so unaware of each other in this society, even when we live under the same roof, and sleep in the same bed. It is such epidemic malady of lonliness, and isolation amongst all of us that inhibit this earth. we have lost the sight of each other amongst the STUFF we gather for our living, they have come to abstract our visions, and torture the simple, soft , lost essence of us that yearns for togetherness and understanding, for we have been blessed by the allmighty with capability of loving and floating in its everpresnt glow, serving us physically and spiritually and yet we do not know who to unwrap this gift, how to give it and if given how to take it.
And I am so much in debt to Cyrus for all his effort and to all of you who take the time and come to me for our gathering and exchanges, for our sharing, -for writers do live a lonely life and yearn to be discovered and brought to the warmth of light. and I owe you this, for you , each and every one, the ones that leave comments and the ones that do not. all of you have made me better, and made my life more joyfull. Thanks
Posted by Idinraha at April 3, 2005 01:09 PM