Idinraha unshackled...

« My Heart Attack | Main | To be incidental »

September 04, 2005

digging

"It's so troubling when things don't fit," -Accidental tourist

Some thing never change and some things never fit. Any way Saturday afternoon late, just finished my twenty fourth Chapter of the book, my eyes hurt and i need distraction. Dr, B is amazed of how fast I am writing these Chapters, and she says, I doubt my work since it comes so easy to me. I don't know but hope springs eternal. Marjan and my mother, tell me I should n't put too much in getting published, they don't want me to get disappointed. The two wisest women in my life. I'm sure once many years from now when my Kiana reads the last sentiment she would object. as long as she is concerned her daddy is hers and no one elses.

Someone asked me if any of what I write is biographical. I tolf her No, but you can only write about what you know. when she asked me to clear my answer further. I told her, yes most of what is in the Book, is events I have seen happen, but with fiction you mix, you give each character to some extent the attributes of people you know, or atleast you start with that, and then it's mind buggling how they take you where you want. I have had many chapters that I had not planned to write, but the events happened and in a way got dictated to me, even surprising me. It definitely is a fun process. so satusfying that I do not write as many rants and poetry any more. everything has taken the back seat to this.

One of my people in the store, who has been witness to my sitting and pounding on the lap top, the other day came to my office looking at me. And I told him, I am like a survivor of a shipwreck that is holding on to a piece of wood floating in the ocean, hoping it would save him. He laughed. In a way like many others who ask me once in a while where I am with the book, he is also surprised that I am still at it, and kept the discipline of coming to the office, and writing every day.

When I told my five and a half audiance in the previous life of this site, hat I will be writing a book on the site every day, my idea was to share the whole process with them. I thought they might enjoy it, but we live in the times of sound bite and McNews, peoples attention span is not more than a paragraph or two at times. And yes there is a good posibility that story was not interesting to them, as one of my readers told me that he doesn't read this kinda stuff. But surprisingly he is the only one that has sticked with me, and by7 leaving me comments he is still reading. He hated the sex scenes, but I told him to hang on, and he seems more happy with the chapters that have come after chapter Ten.

Through out this though Dr, B has been my Rock of stability and encouragements, by giving me some of the kindest and most satisfying reviews, and made me feel, That I might have something, and she still does. She has told me that she has never been a part of a big project like this and she is enjoying it, asking for more at the end of each review. and God knows I may end up writing this book for only these two readers of mine. However the underlying sentiment has always been to leave a diary of my every day life for my kids and my wife. i am not sure if Amin would ever be interested in it. Although he does surprise me plenty by the way he keeps track if everything, and showing that he is always under estimated. Kiana on the other hand, I think she would be the heir apparent for my and my writing aspirations.

She is the one who talks always about taking over the site at some point. and asks about the book all the time. The other day marjan read to me the composition she had written for her teacher about her summer vacation. It was written with such confidence and such clear words and sentiment that made both of filled with pride. these days though I do feel very lonely. I do not have any close friends. i get bored mostly with people, I have no patient, I become arrogant and your basic horse's ass. But recently I feel the loneliness more, maybe because I'm preoccupied with the book.

And the characters don't leave me along, I think about them most of the time, what would happen next, where are we going , trying to keep the readers interested and keeping the story logical and seamless.

Some of it might be my age, and the new sensibilities of living in my age group, but I've always been a recluse, and had to create this different persona in me to socialise, I come across jolly, and humoros, and maybe , a bit too strong specially for people how like to stay private and proper. any way, LIFE IS GOOD , and writing life is fun.

Posted by Idinraha at September 4, 2005 11:23 AM

Comments

Posted by: cycho at September 7, 2005 10:24 AM

Post a comment

Name:

Email Address:

URL:
Remember Me? YesNo

Comments: (you may use HTML tags for style)